by Mrs Shellsuit
It was my Birthday last week. As is traditional I had a ‘few’ drinks with friends. I took the next day off work so I could recover. When I woke up I didn’t feel much like getting dressed, all I wanted to do was have a nice cup of tea and maybe watch some TV as I sprawled myself out on the sofa.
My head was banging a little so I thought a bit of mindless daytime TV was in order to dull the pain. It really wasn’t my day; the milk in the fridge had curdled. The little shop next door sells milk, so I put on my slippers and went out the door.
‘You can’t come go out in public in your pyjamas’ said the patrolling Policeman. I was astonished; there was a Policeman in our street! As I looked around I noticed that the Pixies were also wearing their bedclothes; some of them must have slept in the nude and just wrapped the bed sheets around themselves. I pointed this out to the neighbourhood bobby.
Next thing I knew, a black helicopter was overhead and men were dropping from it on ropes. PC Copper had filmed me using the camera in his Police Helmet. Pictures of me looking at the Pixies had been relayed straight to Police HQ and the Thought Response Unit had been despatched to deal with me.
I was amazed at how fast the Police dealt with my crime. Next time I need a copper I know what to do – I won’t bother with 999, I’ll just look sideways at a Pixie!
Next Birthday that I’m free, I’m sticking to Black Coffee!
